


The Traitor and the Heartbreaker

by orphan_account



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Royalty, Betrayal, Bittersweet Ending, Heartbreak, Jaehyun x Taeyong if you squint, M/M, Pining, Suicidal Thoughts, Unrequited Love, yuwin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-03 20:57:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20459363
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: My name is Nakamoto Yuta and I fell in love with the wrong person at the wrong time.





	The Traitor and the Heartbreaker

Like the wind, he appears out of nowhere one day and presents his gifts to the royal emperor. 

Never have I seen a bow performed with such splendid grace. He curtsies in a way that has the nobles whispering amongst themselves. They gaze at him with envy and awe, for even the emperor himself doesn’t know the origins of this mysterious Dong Sicheng. 

His gifts for the emperor are humble and magnificent at the same time. A peacock who sings the sweetest morning tunes, a music box that plays any lyrical song ever written, a blossom tree of glowing figs, a little poem he recites that sounds like a cheer. Clever boy who’s heard of the emperor’s love for music, song, and dance. 

Sicheng is given his own quarters and a feast is being prepared in honor of his arrival. I have never seen His Majesty taken a liking to anybody so quickly. Then again, I have never seen anyone dually so courteous and lovely. I suppose I had no chance against fate, for I was enchanted at first sight. 

He dances at his own feast, tells the emperor he’s going to dedicate this one especially for him. I know his dance isn’t meant for me, but I have never seen anything so lovely with my own eyes before. My eyes follow every graceful leap, every coy smile that brought out dimples. My goodness, this boy is going to be the death of me. 

I know he’d caught the attention of the emperor as well. No other person in this kingdom had hair like woven gold or walks with such soft apparition. Such soft honey-brown eyes that I want to melt into them. I give him my best smile as I lead him to his new chambers, and my heart flutters when he shyly smiles back. 

I also know that things will not turn out well for me. I have known the emperor since we were both boys, and he has been one of my longest friends so much so that I was named his Royal Advisor years ago. Now I wish we had never met because I would have never known how kind, gentle, and righteous Emperor Taeyong was. I wouldn’t have felt guilt for pining after the same young man he pines after, Dong Sicheng. I long for him in the same way the emperor does, and if the emperor notices, he says nothing of the matter to me. He is kind and patient like he always is, and he and I continue our shared music appreciation. But he has this glint in his glittering dark eyes that wasn’t there before Dong Sicheng. 

The syllables of his name roll off my tongue in delightful ways, and since he has come to make a home in the palace I make it a personal goal to befriend him. I spend time with him everyday, especially if the emperor couldn’t. I was awestruck, mad with affection, absolutely in deep. Little did I know that the emperor’s infatuation would stem far beyond mine. 

He builds Dong Siceng a brand new tower in his castle and from that day onward, we whom also live at the castle have hardly seen a shadow of the golden-haired dancer. I do not know when they began their affair, but I assume it must have been quickly. 

* * *

I catch them one day, entirely by accident. I was bringing the emperor some nighttime tea to his chambers and I open the door a little too quietly, a little too quickly. They do not see me there, even though I let out a quiet gasp.

Their bodies are naked and streaked with dried sweat, tangled up in the sheets. The emperor softly strokes the golden hair as they lay side by side. The way the moonlight grazes his hair is nothing less than beautiful, and the emperor’s hands are stark and white up against gold. When Sicheng reaches a hand to brush away the emperor’s hair, his golden skin contrasts the emperor’s fiery red hair. 

I do not know how long I was standing there. All I know is that I leave the moment they embrace again. Their movements are so tender, so love-riddled that it cracks my heart into two before I close the magnificent double oaken doors to the room. 

I try not to cry, but end up screaming despair into the pillow that entire hollow night. There would be many more lonely nights to come, for I could not imagine myself ever loving someone else. 

* * *

Taeyong asks me to be the man of honor at his wedding. How does one turn down the emperor? I even help Sicheng prepare on their wedding day by threading pearls to put into his veil and dusting his eyelids with glitter.

He looks astonishing, absolutely out of this world beautiful. If it was painful dolling him up for him to marry my best friend, I am in absolute agony as I watch him walk down the aisles to his new husband. For a moment I contemplate interrupting the priest’s forever hold your peace, but Taeyong looks at him with such intensity, such longing, such gazes of adoration that I couldn’t move myself to ruin this moment for them. 

I drown myself in drink that night as I watch the man I love like a brother and the man I love with all my heart dance the night away in each other’s arms. 

* * *

I, Nakamoto Yuta, have never considered myself to be an awful person. Like every other human, I’ve done some things I’m not proud of, but for the most part I try very hard to put forward my best self. I hardly see Sicheng nowadays.

At first I thought that would be for the best, that maybe time could allow me to forget about him. But it seems like I simply wasn’t meant to forget him.

For he occupies my mind almost every second of every day, every moment of every stark night. The more I drink to forget him, the more he haunts me in my dreams. 

I am staring down the balcony, contemplating if it was still worth the suffering when I hear the chamberlain’s voice.

“I know you’re hurting, but it’s not worth it.”

I whip around and glare at Jaehyun. “The hell are you talking about?” 

“I’ve seen the way you look at him.” He regards me with a sad look in his eyes. “I know how you feel because I look at the emperor in the same unrequited way. It is...the most painful feeling one could ever experience.”

“You don’t know a thing,” I scoff, crossing my arms, “About me or my life.”

“Maybe,” Jaehyun replies, “But I know that love isn’t selfish. I want to see him happy. And that’s why I’m leaving in a few weeks, I have already handed in my letter of resignation. You need to leave as well, Yuta. Staying here  _ will _ kill you.”

* * *

The one time I came close to coming between them is when I am delivering them a message late at night. My stomach is flipping in knots, dreading what I’ll find when I open the door. However before I could open it, I hear something that makes me stop dead in my tracks. I press my ear closer to the door.

“You don’t care that my original mission was to seduce you and kill you on our wedding night?” Sicheng’s deep voice has never sounded so remorseful, and my heart breaks all over again.

“But I am still here, without having ever suffered at your hands.” The emperor’s voice sounds exhausted but I can still hear the love in it.

“It wasn’t supposed to be this way. I was supposed to gouge out your heart and take it and your kingdom back to my father as a prize. I wasn’t supposed to fall in love with you.”

“But you did,” I hear the emotion in the emperor’s voice, “And that means everything to me. Your love, it saved me.”

“It saved us both. When I first saw you, I knew that I was in trouble. It was at first sight.”

“Sicheng, you were that determined?”

“To accomplish my mission at first, yes. But everything changed when I met you.”

“Baby, you were that determined to be with me?”

“Yes. I sent the poison back to my own kingdom through the food and drink you provided as parting gifts. Everyone who wanted you dead will soon fall themselves.” Sicheng’s dark tone sends a shiver down my spine. This doesn’t change how I feel for him. In fact, it makes me fall even deeper for him. 

“You...severed ties with your own kingdom. All this for me?”

“Taeyong, I am in love with you. I have been since the moment we first met. I would do anything for you, especially if it means saving your life so we can be husbands.”

“Oh Sicheng, how I love you.” The emperor’s voice is quivering. “Come here, baby.”

I walk off, afraid that I would drop dead right then and there if I hear anymore.

* * *

“I don’t understand what prompted this, Yuta,” the emperor frowns at me. “You haven’t gone back to your hometown in years. Is something in the castle not to your liking? You can tell me anything.” 

“Of course not, Your Majesty,” I say with the brightest smile on my face as the stagecoach driver takes my last piece of luggage. “I thought a change of scenery might be a breath of fresh air for me, and I do miss my home more than I can imagine.”

“Well, you will always be welcome in my kingdom,” Emperor Taeyong tells me, putting an affectionate hand on my shoulder. This is who he is, I think. This is the kind of man my brother is.

“Thank you, Your Majesty. I sure appreciate that.”

“Take good care of yourself, Yuta. Sicheng, my love, would you like to bid Yuta goodbye as well?”

“I will always remember how kind you were towards me.Thank you for taking good care of me, and I will always think about you.” His smile makes me go weak at the knees, and I almost come undone.

But I hold my composure and my smile enough to wave them goodbye. _ Love isn’t selfish. _

My brother and the love of my life, their happiness comes before my own. It gives me a sense of peace, a sort of closure to know that they are safe and happy in each other’s arms. That love is something they can provide for each other. 

And I couldn't help but wonder as I watched them walk away hand-in-hand into the sun-bled horizon, that maybe in some other universe I could be the one holding Sicheng’s hand and his heart instead.

**Author's Note:**

> Drabble to serve as writing practice, I'm so sorry for the angst ._. Expect to see more Yuwin and Taeyong x Winwin and Yutaewin from me! (stories with happier endings)


End file.
